Category Archives: 1 Christ is All

Jesus loves me, this I know. This category is about Jesus, the Living Word, my prayers to Him, my worship of Him, His relentless pursuit of my heart and His invitation to me to come to Him in Sabbath, my Savior, my Rest.

Abundance of Rain

Here are my {humble and extremely astute, hahahaha!} observations on what happens when a lot of rain comes quickly…

Nothing profound or scientific here.  Just my thoughts running downstream…

You may be praying for it (in arid, semi-desert areas, we often do), but it shows up in the night while you are totally unprepared, sleeping, minding your own business.

  • Rocky and Jovan had no warning, when at 3 am, their electricity was out and within 20 minutes they watched water rise from the second step to just a couple of feet from their main level, reaching nearly 6 feet high in their basement.  They couldn’t drive out of their cul-de-sac because the street was already rushing and deep, but had to pack quickly for three baby girls.  It can be sudden.  It was in this case.

It rips your belongings from their places and they just float away.

  • The next day, Rocky went to his house and everything downstairs was just floating around on its side: furnace, hot water heater, washer, dryer, computers, musical recording equipment and sound systems.  All of Rocky’s guitars and instruments (the ones he learned to worship on), were soaked and floating or submersed.   Material things float away in a flood, in an abundance of rain.

It fills the creeks, the rivers, bursts through dams, flows down it’s normal contained path in ever-rising power then through streets and places that cannot contain it.

  • It gets dangerous.  It shows up where we were glad to have it and where we weren’t.  But it is the nature of abundance.  It’s everywhere.  It rains on the just and on the unjust, in good ways and in ways that we were not expecting and don’t know how to handle.

Everybody wants to claim they got more of it than some one else.

  • I don’t want to say too much about this for fear I’ll end up totally snarky.  So let me just say, if you lost anything at all, if you are now faced with mold growing where the basement flooded and your childhood keepsakes are gone – it is a loss.  It is horrible.  And I hope you have some one in your life who will acknowledge that and let you say why the loss affected you and how sad you feel.  I really do.   But there were people whose houses stayed completely dry who acted like they had been banished to a completely undeveloped third world country  because a road half a mile away couldn’t be transversed for 24-48 hours.  Keep perspective and get into gratefulness.  Maybe the next big tragedy will be all about you – won’t that be nice?  There!  See?  I got into snarkiness.  I cannot be trusted.

Some people will lose a lot and then be recompensed with piles of pious platitudes.

  • Mourn with those who mourn.  Maybe what they lost didn’t mean anything to you, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t mean anything to them.  They are tired.  They have a lot of work ahead.  When they say, “Oh-I just found out I lost {some, silly, ridiculous, sentimental, inconsequential thing} in the flood,”  we should commiserate, we should sympathize, and maybe if we know what that is like, we should empathize.  For how long?  Until they are done.  My conjecture is that if we’d stop and mourn with those who are mourning, their mourning would turn into dancing a whole lot sooner.  Sometimes what is lost isn’t recognized right away anyway, in the shocking aftermath of a new normal, of material loss.   Encourage, literally give them some of your courageListen, let them tell you why that {silly, ridiculous, sentimental, inconsequential thing} meant something.  But refrain, pleeeeeease, from pious-sounding-cliches and especially from a “knowing look” that God sent this hard thing to work something in their lives that you totally knew they needed.  Because you will not want that coming back on you!

rocky and jovan summer 2012

The rushing water brings a cleansing, but cleansing strips away things we didn’t count on, too.

  • It is a heavenly do-over.  Now what will we do with it?  It’s a chance to right wrongs, fresh slate, build better, travel lighter, haul away the concentrated, contaminated mud for good.
  • But in the cleansing – I have one friend who lost everything including her home in Lyons.  There is nothing for her to even go back to, her home and those who lived near – all gone.  The land will be cleared and maybe eventually that will seem fine, safer for the future, but right now – it represents many families, people who have nowhere to call “home.”
  • So?  A fresh slate can be good, it is also very empty – much work to do!

If the water gets stuck in one spot, it will become stagnant.

  • There is so much contamination throughout our state now, as the rain has ceased and the rushing has subsided and is sitting still.  I have read about the revivals of old, Azusa, the Welsh Revival.  Powerful moves of God flowing through and changing the landscape, were eventually dammed up, “named”, coined phrases were assigned to them for categorizing the flow of the Holy Spirit.  The rains can be administrated and basically contained…to death.  Choose life from this wet mess!

The bug population will suddenly be crazy after it happens.

  • Because even where the rains have made the grass and trees greener than ever in our state at this time of year, when the good stuff is increased, the annoying stuff {fatigue sets in, bickering, backbiting, distrust, unrest, eye-rolling, offense} increases around it, too.  Be aware.  Be wary.  Be on guard.  They seek to destroy the green-life we are enjoying.

See?  Nothing profound or scientific.  Just a bunch of thoughts rattling around, things I see.

The Bible says where the river flows everything will live.  This will eventually probably be one of the most beautiful autumns Colorado has ever seen {both in the natural and because it is bringing people together to do good for one another}.  It will take time to rebuild, to get “back to normal,” to regain what was lost.  But even now, are we not seeing clearly the great grace and love of God, His heart poured out in love towards us, His great grace at work through His people.  He is good.  We know this now.  But – in the looking back someday, how amazed we will really be, I am sure of it!

~~~~~~~~~~

Zumba, baby!

zumba

Meanwhile, the amazing Tammy Brown (the outrageously gorgeous woman married to the ineffable Lewis “Proxy” Brown, yes THAT Tammy) is doing a fitness-fundraiser {how fun is that?} to help Rocky and Jovan as they work to recover their losses!  It’s a ZUMBA-thing!  You should ALL come!  Seriously!  THIS kind of abundance – it’s a love-rain!

Thanks to so many who are helping so many others and especially those who are loving on my familia.

 

Amy Grant’s How Mercy Looks from Here // Music on a Monday

Because Rainy Days & Mondays and especially this particular Monday could really use a good song…

The water rose today,

The river with the rain

Memories and picture frames

Are floating miles away.

Through the wreckage and the mud,

The ruins after the flood,

She survived at 91, hmm

 

Some would have given up

Drowning in their tears

But on her wrinkled face

A smile appeared.

 

When you face your greatest fear

Losing all that you hold near

Open up your eyes my dear,

Oh how mercy looks from here.

 

The call I couldn’t take,

Unbearable mistakes

A brilliant mind that fades away

A baby doll beside the grave

 

When you face your greatest fear

Losing all that you hold near

Open up your eyes my dear

Oh how mercy looks from here.

 

I would have given up, drowning in my tears

If it wasn’t for your voice all these years

 

When you face your greatest fear

Losing all that you hold near

Open up your eyes my dear

My dear

 

That’s when boundless grace appears

Unseen angels hover near

Saints are singing loud and clear

Oh how mercy looks from here.

Oh how mercy looks from here.

 

Oh how mercy looks from here.

Oh how mercy looks from here.

 

The water rose today…

I think Tara had Jovan listen to this the other and what a perfect song for our situation.  So, for Jovan, but for us all for all we have held dear and lost anyway…

Passing the Personality Test

You can’t submit to a personality-lobotomy to gain approval from others.  It won’t work. It will be ill-fitting, uncomfortable.  Nor should you hate who God created you to be because you don’t always fit in or have experienced pain in your humanness (God knows you’re human, you know).  Every single personality type has its strengths and weaknesses.

We just think we’re the oddball.

Meanwhile in two separate conversations on this exact subject, but at the opposite ends of the spectrum (self-hatred vs people-pleasing), the movie line below still cracks me up.

Preface: John Cusack is quite possibly the most underrated actor in America today.  And by underrated, I just mean he should be paid more per movie than  – almost any other actor -alive -anywhere.  Because in my book (and among really intelligent people the world over, I am sure) he is just awesome!  So try to imagine him (or watch the movie)…

From Must Love Dogs (2007)…John Cusack’s character, Jake, has hand-crafted a boat using time-honored skills and much work and is speaking to a possible buyer…

jake in boat must love dogs screenshot

Boat Guy: Man, this is absolutely gorgeous. I love this. I can’t believe you built it yourself.
JAKE: Yeah, handcrafted. Hand-carved.  I hope you’ll find that it’s more than a boat.  It’s a time machine.
Boat Guy: I love it. I want it. I’ll take it.
JAKE: Great. Did you race a lot in college?
Boat Guy: I don’t plan to race it. Could you cut it in half for me?
JAKE: Excuse me?
Boat Guy: Yeah, cut it in half lengthwise. I think it would be easier to mount on the wall that way.
JAKE: You want to mount the boat?
Boat Guy: Yeah. I thought I’d put it in the den. It’d look great above my big screen.
JAKE: You know, I think maybe you should go to IKEA and buy a canoe. It’s not for sale in that way.
Boat Guy (to Jake’s friend): He’s kidding, right?
Jake’s friend: Wouldn’t that be nice.
JAKE: I’ve had this dream that it’ll end up wet.  It’s just not for sale in that way at this time. Ever, really.
Boat Guy: Okay. Well, if you change your mind, I really do want it.

JAKE: Yeah, if I change my personality, I’ll let you know what I become.

Don’t try to change your personality.  But you can work on renewing your mind.  Romans 12.2…then you’ll be the best version of you, the one God had in mind when He created you.  That will be comfortable skin to be in!

 

Real Community

The ones who hear you’ve been displaced {kicked-to-the-curb, removed, dismissed, expelled, terminated, cut off, locked out, let go}, whether you deserved to be disinherited or not, and come outside the borders and stand there with you anyway.  Those are your people.

There won’t be as many as you thought.  But wow, you’ll finally understand the worth of the ones who stay.

friends who turned in to family

David left…and escaped to the cave…When his brothers and his father’s household heard about it, they went down to him there. All those who were in distress or in debt or discontented gathered around him… (1 Samuel 22.1-2)

They might not look like the most beautiful bunch at first, but I bet to David, coming out of that cave, they looked amazing.

Look around.  You are not alone.

{Plenty}

[the LORD] will fill your barns with grain,

and your vats will overflow with good wine.

Proverbs 3.9-10

I haven’t gone out to harvest today’s garden goodies yet.  But this is already in my “tomato bowl” this morning.  The bowl is 18″ diameter, 6″ deep.  And full – 4 types of tomatoes.

harvest tomatoes

For a few months, gardening has been tending to, working, weeding, watering, feeding, watching over with hope and expectancy.

Then suddenly…

He who cultivates his land will have plenty of bread…

Proverbs 28.19a

I can hardly get used to this heavy-with-harvest time.  I go out to work a little, water a bit and come in with so much reward, my arms and shirt filled with garden goodies of all kinds – enough to enjoy and share!  And I am still overwhelmed by these daily benefits (loaded with them!), astonished with joy over finding new mercies among the leaves, sort of amazed and giggling at the miracle of it: Look what God has done!  I apologize in advance – I cannot help myself.  I throw a load on the counter and whip out the iPhone. *snap!

harvest chiles

Dave caught me scrolling through my phone’s camera roll and smiling.  Because this is the time I was waiting for {{nearly breathless, quietly~quietly hoping}}, and am yet so happily dazzled over: harvest time!  I knew down deep it was coming {hoped-against-hope it would}, but I have still been captured by surprise!

And I will restore for you the years that the locust has eaten—the hopping locust, the stripping locust, and the crawling locust…

And you shall eat in plenty and be satisfied and praise the name of the Lord, your God, Who has dealt wondrously with you. And My people shall never be put to shame.

Joel 2.25-26

harvest peppers

It takes all my strength not to plaster all 37 images I have taken of my veggies in the last week right here on this blog.  Yesterday, as I was juggling red, juicy tomatoes and heavy, dark green cucumbers with assorted peppers and just-right zucchini with straightneck squash to bring them into the house, it was perhaps the third load, as the sun was shining on me and the purple petunias were cheering me on in their perfumed and wavy way, I heard a voice (in my spirit, not literally)  narrating my story from heaven ~

“The seeds were buried in hot,  black soil on a spring day by faith.  Waiting, not always patiently, but certainly with expectancy…waiting…Then one day, the harvest became so plentiful she could barely keep up ~ armfuls of plenty, abundance filling every nook, every cranny.  The time of abundance had come.  At last”

Yes, I know I am a little over-the-top about gardening, but don’t you also find it incredibly stunning that God allows us to join Him in creating a profusion of life-giving food?  Don’t you think it is an honor to get to tend to these miraculous growing things and then He just gives them to us?!  I am a humbled recipient of the summer yield, a wealth of delicious, seed-bearing, life-giving, nutritious, lovely sustenance for my body and soul – this from a seed I watched die in the soil.  Supernatural provision, people!

I am intoxicated with gratefulness for the Creator.  I am.

Do not be deceived…A man reaps what he sows…Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6.7-9 NIV

Song for a Sunday // He’s All I Need

I’ve sung this song a million heart-felt times, as a Pentecostal preacher’s daughter and beyond.  The simple lyric and soul-and-spirit-engaging melody could draw us right in, as I was growing up, and make us Pentecostals worship and cry out to God for a long time on a Sunday night – back when there were still Sunday night services.

He’s all I need.  He’s all I need.  Jesus is all I need~

He’s all I need.  He’s all I need.  Jesus is all I need!

Author-unknown

 

The Crabbs captured the feel pretty well here.

No matter how sophisticated I ever get in my song choices or worship, in the really intimate times with God, this one still says what I need to say, the way I need to say it.  Because Christ IS all, Jesus is everything.

I am helpless, hopeless, broken.  I struggle, I fail, I fall again and again.  I blow it, when will that ever stop?…

But He?  Is ever faithful, ever true, ever forgiving.  In my helpless state ~

You are the Source

You are the Light

You are the Life

You are the Answer

You are my Help

You are my Provision

You are my Champion

You are my Creator

You are my Restorer

You are my Shield

You are my Peace

You are my Rest

You are my God, my Father, my true Abba-Dad

You are my All in All, and all I really need.

This song and me – both relics.  But my need for a Savior?  Current.  Very current.  Thank goodness there is this ~

lamentations 3

 Music

Tentative Trust, when we don’t understand

Things don’t always happen the way we thought they would. David the Psalmist must have felt that, too.

Why so downcast oh, my soul, put your trust in God!”

“No thanks, depression and fatigue – you can’t come in.”

ps 32.8

Took this  woodsy picture in Peaceful Valley last week!  It was just after a rain, overcast, but bright. From the shadows, there was a path out…

This is me, struggling with some things I don’t understand, putting my trust in God:

  1. All the days planned for me were written in His book before I was even one day old (Psalm 139.16).  Just because the days aren’t feeling purposeful enough for me or the time I am in holds lots of unanswered questions, I am not wandering aimlessly.  The days I know-that-I-know I am fully/gloriously in the center of His planned will for my life versus the days I am wondering what the heck that will is don’t affect the story He wrote for my life.  I am in His sights. His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me…
  2. He will never leave me, nor forsake me (Deut. 31.6).  I have that horrible tendency to drift into that ridiculous thinking that if I am not smack in the middle of some great move of God somewhere {working my head off} that I have somehow been locked out of the Kingdom, the only univited person to all the good Kingdom parties.  In my heart of hearts, I am ever more aware, the quieter it gets, the closer He is (it’s how He draws me near).  Behold, the Kingdom of God is at hand.  He is with me.  With me!
  3. “Therefore, don’t be foolish.  Understand what the Lord’s will is” (Eph. 5.17).  If I don’t have enough things happening, needs to fulfill, ministry to get done, places to be or people to see, if there is a holy dissatisfaction with the status quo, then setting myself to understanding God’s will should keep me pretty occupied – a pretty full assignment, I’d say.  Finding out from Him for my life, “What is THIS {particular place &} time for?” seems like a worthy pursuit leaving little room for feeling tentative.

You know, even after amazing, great times of spiritual victories, the prophet Elijah had some extreme fatigue and depression come knocking on his door.  He must have felt tentative about any kind of future or anything good ahead for his life because he actually told God he’d had enough and wanted God to take him out.

But the God of the Universe never left Elijah.  God is so faithful like that.  He didn’t tell Elijah to pull himself up by his bootstraps and to get his hustle on.  God fed him and caused him to sleep, fed him again and gave him more rest.  God comforted him. Then God spoke to Elijah in a still, small voice and eventually sent him to his next assignment – lots more cool stuff was on the horizon for his life!

While we may be feeling unsettled or unconfirmed, there is probably already a plan in place for some wonderful adventure in faith, an exciting storyline written by God for our lives before time even began.  Get ready for your cue, watch for the brightly lighted path out…

I went to a garden party

Tomorrow is another day.

garden 8 24 13b

But today there were peppers: Hungarian Wax and Sweet Bananas and Salsa-Jalepenos and my wondrous, most glorious Poblanos (there will be chile rellenos in the next couple of days, oh, yes, there will be!).  There were 4 types of tomatoes and some zucchini and squash.  Oh and the tomatillas are going to be amazing, I can tell from the very first one, ever!  Got a big bunch of chamomile and 2 nice, fluffy bunches of kale.  I got Brussels Sprouts greens and some cukes, plenty of dill (called a weed for good reason) and good heavens – what will we do with all of this basil?  There’s some Rosemary and a few beets, and many-many-many more peppers to come tomorrow!  Not everything is pictured here because ~ it just wouldn’t fit!

Three 4 things about today in the garden:

1.  Today was nearly perfect, seriously.  The temperature, the blue sky, everything.  Being in the garden today is a reward, not work.  Such grace!

2.  I am reminded that between the time you drop the seed into soil and the time your arms can barely contain the harvest, many things happen and much time goes by.  But it will happen.  If you plant the seed and actively wait, watching, making sure it gets moisture and sun and time {you can’t hurry love} – oh yes, time is so necessary, well, then – you will reap a harvest.  You will eat of the fruit of your labor of love.  The time you gave, the blood, sweat and tears you spilled into the ground – will reward you, by the grace of God.

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap…And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.

Galatians 6.7-9 nkjv

Seed-time and harvest are two distinct and specific times.  Don’t give up in the middle!

3.  You MUST apply yourself to using this beautiful, natural, organic bounty to its’ fullest glory.  Do not let this be what happens:

fruits and vegetables

qsprn.com

No – let nothing of the sort happen!

4.  Making more salsa tomorrow.  Yum!  :)

There is a garden

Something like the shadow of a butterfly

And lies beyond the gates of dark and light

And, darling, it belongs to me

 

When you go there

There will be such laughter in the dimpled sky

The songs you sing will drive away the night

The magic garden has a way of making you feel free

-Magic Garden by 5th Dimension

You’ll know it when you hear it

Worship isn’t a fast song, getting the blood pumping or the excitement built,

Worship isn’t a slow song of somber reverence

It isn’t necessarily even a song

But it can be a song

And since I like to sing, since music is my medium for deep-heart things,

my worship often comes out in a melody, usually with words

It isn’t about the song being loud or being soft

to make it worship (true worship, the kind the Father is listening for…)

“Worship is when your heart touches your Father” (Tommy Bates)

Have you ever started singing to the Lord and the love poured out of you so strongly you suddenly became aware that He was right there, in Person, giving you His complete and undivided attention?  The Presence.  There is nothing like it.  He inhabits our praises…

So.  The question in Amos 5 gets me every time: when was the last time you sang to Me?

amos 5 when was the last time you sang to me
image taken in Peaceful Valley, August 2013

So, you’ll know it when you hear it, because you’ll know when you have touched His heart.

Song for a Sunday // A Very Present Help

Oh, my word.  Every time I NEED help from the sanctuary, I get surprised all over again, amazed and shocked that the God of the Universe, the Creator of everything – yes, THAT God- our Father, the Blessed Redeemer, the Savior of mankind, the Alpha and Omega {the Beginning and the End}, the Holy Spirit of God Himself, He is also the One who is the Helper {MY help}, helping me, helping me!

He helps us.  He is our Helper!  I keep forgetting this and God keeps reminding me.  I keep doubting it and He keeps proving it is true, time and again.

Circumstances can look bleak, the path obscured, answers seem hopelessly hidden.  We shake our heads, barely breathing out to Him…We pray, God, help me…and then He does.

Reading Frank Viola, God’s Favorite Place on Earth, in his account of the raising of Lazarus from the dead:

“…as high as God is going to elevate you is as deep as He digs to lay the foundation.

Sometimes the brightest light comes from the darkest places. And what doesn’t destroy you ends up defining you in some significant way…

Interestingly, Lazarus is the shortened form of a name that means ‘God helps.'”

I’d say being raised from the DEAD qualifies as being helped!   :)

The dictionary says to help is to give assistance or support; to make more pleasant or bearable (improve, relieve, rescue, save). It says to help is to be of use to (benefit); to further the advancement of (promote) or even to serve with food or drink as in a meal {Reminds me of “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies”}.

He is a very present HELP in time of need.

“I lift up my eyes to the mountains—

where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord,

the Maker of heaven and earth.” Psalm 121

So here is this old song for this new Sunday: Made Me Glad by Hillsong, based on Psalm 46 and every word true!

I will bless the Lord forever

And I will trust Him at all times

He has delivered me from all fear

And he has set my feet upon a rock

And I will not be moved

And I’ll say of the Lord….

You are my shield

My strength

My portion

Deliverer

My shelter

Strong tower

My very present help in time of need

Whom have I in Heaven but you?

There’s none I desire beside you

You have made me glad

And I’ll say of the Lord….

You are my shield

My strength

My portion

Deliverer

My shelter

Strong tower

My very present help in time of need

citydata.com/boulder

Friends and family, let me declare/speak/pray this blessing over you:: May the everlasting One hear you today and send help from His sanctuary.  May the most Helpful One come to your rescue, bringing provision and relief and providing the support you need right now and be so very, very present.  I pray this for you – for the Help you need.  Amen!