Monthly Archives: August 2008

The Sacred Romance, Some Catching Up

1 Christ is All, 9 TV & Movies/Books & Entertainment, Stuff I Actually Think, , , , , , ,
Heather and I commented on Chapter Ten here.   Amy Jo shared her thoughts on both Chapters 10 and 11 here.   And now our good friend, Candi shares some insights she has received from Chapters 10 and  11: “On the Road,” and “Desert Communion – Learning to Live on Heaven’s Shores”  and I add my 2-cents’ worth on Chapter 11.  
   
pictured:   Heather and her family and Amy Jo and her husband

We are nearing the  end of the book,  The Sacred  Romance~Drawing Closer to the Heart of God  by John Elderidge and Brent Curtis.   We have all been reading the book and jotting down our reactions and thoughts to share with you.   I am glad to know some of you have read the book along with us and even though you didn’t necessarily wish to “tell all” via the blog, it has been good to hear how God has reaffirmed His love to you through the reading.   If you want to re-cap where we started and see how far we have come during our “summer romance”, just click on the “Sacred Romance” category link on the left, or here to get you started.

 

Candi picks up at Chapter 10: I’ve been away from The Sacred Romance for awhile.   Not THE Sacred Romance, but the book.   In fact, although I’ve been out of the book I have completely had THE Sacred Romance on my mind the whole time.   As I reread Chapter 10 (I’ve read it about 4 times now) I’m realizing that I AM starting to view things differently, from a different perspective.   It is all about “wondering what God is up to in all of this.”   Pg 145.  

I’m ready for the Journey.   From Pg. 149,   “So much of the journey forward involves a letting go of all that once brought us life.   We turn away from the familiar abiding places of the heart, the false selves we have lived out, the strengths we have used to make a place for ourselves and all our false loves, and we venture forth in our hearts to trace the steps of the One who said, ‘Follow me.’   In a way, it means that we stop pretending: that life is better than it is, that we are happier than we are, that the false selves we present to the world are really us.”As I prepare for the journey (finally!) I’m looking back at the many times I’ve desired to go on it but for various reasons have not completely surrendered to it.   I’m starting to analyze past situations, relationships, thoughts, “Nits”, and my roles in them for what many of them really were, but I’m also asking what God’s real purpose is in all of this.   It’s really been a path to discovery more than a hard road.   And it’s all leading me to Jesus!

About 3 years ago I started realizing that my focus for salvation was for what I could get (the streets of gold!) rather than really desiring and fostering a relationship with God.   A dear spiritual teacher (MaryJean!) gave me this and I pass it along because it really was the beginning to my Sacred Romance with Jesus:

             

              It’s not healing I need – It’s the healer.

It’s not help I need – It’s the helper.

It’s not comfort I need – It’s the comforter.

It’s not teaching I need – It’s the teacher.

It’s not provision I need – It’s the provider.

It’s not protection I need – It’s the defender.

It’s not strength I need – It’s the strong one.

I don’t need to get a life; I need life, HIMSELF.

On Chapter 11: Now I find myself at a time of desert communion.   I understand this as the path that I’ve been on from reading this.   Had I written on this a month ago I wouldn’t have had much application.   Just this past month my husband and I have completely stepped out of ministry at our church.   A couple years ago our church faced a “perfect storm” scenario that if it wasn’t for God’s will and power I know it may not have survived.   At times like this God calls you to help man the ship although you may not be the best sailor.   You do the best you can through obedience knowing that He will provide the sails.   Well, through God’s glory there has been much healing and the church is sailing on much more secure waters.  

My husband and I were still a part of the crew.   However, we were still feeling caught up in the “doing” of it all.   I was trying to seek God in the aftermath, but too busy to really hear Him.   Isn’t it funny we were “doing” church things?   And so, for our various reasons we have stopped everything.   In this break, I’m asking myself, “Is my identity synonymous with activity?”   Pg. 163.   “Am I experiencing my spiritual life not as a love affair, but as burdensome, heavy, exhausting and alien?”   Pg. 165.

Jesus’ answer is this:  

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.   Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.   For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matt. 11:28-30)  

“Only Christ can carry us to rest.   The kinds of ‘doing’s’ we have learned are not weighty enough to allow us to walk in the spiritual fields of the kingdom of God.”   Pg. 169.

My next destination on my journey, I now know, is to “give up everything else but Him.   We experience the freedom of knowing that he simply loves us where we are.   We begin to just be, having our identity anchored in him.   We begin to experience our spiritual life as the ‘easy yoke and light burden’ Jesus tells us is his experience.”   Pg. 175.

Lord, I pray that I am always “hearing” your soft whisper and in turn whispering back to you.   Forgive me for not always making our desert communion the focus of my spiritual walk, and instill in me a repentant attitude.   Bring healing, rest, focus, and peace at this time, so I can serve once again with my whole heart to glorify your Name.

My turn on Chapter 11 (Jeanie):   This chapter is about learning to rest in God and His unbridled love for us as we follow Christ’s own tradition (as well as early church “Desert  Fathers”) to pull away from the restlessness and activity of life into the “spiritual disciplines of silence, solitude, meditation (heart prayer), fasting and simplicity” (Mark Buchanan includes these in his “holy habits” in the book, Your God is too Safe).

The author talks about that place when you really stop for just a minute, when you have pulled your heart away from your adrenalin-addicted, activity captivity and your heart tells you how truly tired and burdened and worn down you are.   He said, “…it is of no use to ask God to give us energy to make our way back up the cliff over which we have fallen.”   I had to laugh at that because I have tried.   Lord knows I have prayed and prayed (God, heal me, give me energy to do kingdom work, yada yada yada)  and made all my friends pray it, too!  

But I love the prayer in the book, “Jesus, help me.   All my lovers have failed me.   Forgive me.   I cannot quench my thirst.   Give me the water of life.”   It is prayer God can answer in the deep places of our hearts.     And He’ll tell us, “Go, and sin no more.”

I’ve most recently been overwhelmed in the tiniest beginning of understanding about the Father-Heart of God towards me.   And in that, God is practically leading me through verdant woodlands of his love, green lush life and babbling brooks of refreshment, a recognition that all He has is mine because, and simply because, I am His child.   He is a few steps ahead and spreading the branches so I can navigate this place of purity and life.   I keep getting glimpses, as He is calling me toward Himself, right over here, Jeanie, come on, and I can see my true homeland just beyond in fleeting moments.   Just a few more steps and I may actually get this thing…

But I backslide.   I slide back into thinking I need to impress Him with my righteousness or my work for Him or by “paying my own way.”   Wait – the branches just moved.   He keeps wooing me.   My Father loves me.   It is OK for me to go into the desert with Him.   It is OK not to have an answer when some one wonders what all I have been “doing” for Him.   He calls us to the Secret Place.

I so enjoyed the author’s word pictures describing the intimate and wild-love of the Song of Solomon in direct contrast to the imaginary couple at a sidewalk cafe, where as the bride-to-be is talking about her excitement for the upcoming wedding and how she can’t wait to get to know her  lover better and be with him more and experience true intimacy, he, a cad, tells her, “I’ll send you a book that describes more about my life.   I’m sure you’ll get a lot out of it,” and “…I’d like to send you to a weekend seminar [about intimacy with me] and that should be very helpful.”   The writers pointed out that that is the way we very often carry on our love affair with God.   When in reality, the conversation would be more like that in The Song of Songs, which everybody knows is some pretty hot talk!   But on page 161 when the  writer is explaining that God isn’t giving us this glimpse through the bedroom window at the love affair between Solomon and the Queen of Sheba just to be voyeuristic (but rather to realize that “this is the kind of passion He feels for us and desires from us in return”), I had to laugh!  

It turns out I am, indeed, the Queen of Sheba!   Spiritually speaking, of course, and you are, too!

Sincerely Yours, The Queen of Sheba, aka…Jeanie
NOTE TO SELF:   So grateful for the friends who have so openly shared the glimpses of God’s work in their lives through their responses to this book.   That ain’t always easy!

How Many Bibles Do You Own?

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Sorry the quality is low on this graphic.   But hopefully you can see what we’re looking for: new or nearly new Bibles, Children’s Bibles, Bible Dictionaries, Concordances, Bible Commentaries – those that you bought but just sit there on the shelf because you have a different favorite.   If you have any of these that you’d like to see go to making an impact, GWO is taking a truckload down next month to supply the pastors and people of this  four-corners, thousands of square miles Navajo Reservation.   This was the thing they said they most needed at this time: Bibles!

C’mon, do you really need 11 copies of the NIV on your shelf?

Contact me if you’d like more information or have Bibles to donate.   I’ll be happy to get them to Get the Word Out/Mary Jean.   Hey-see if your church would send out an e-blast and gather a load this Sunday or next???

The Touching Tomato Garden Story

4 Home & Garden/Food & Seasons, Stuff I Actually Think, ,

An old, Italian man lived alone in the country.   He wanted
to dig his tomato garden, but it was very hard work as the
ground was hard.   His only son, Vincent, who usually  helped him,
was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and
described his predicament.

Dear Vincent,  

I am feeling pretty low because it looks like
I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just
getting too old to be digging up a garden plot.   I know if you
were here my troubles would be over.   I know you would be happy
to dig the plot for me.  

Love, Dad

A few days later he received a letter from his
son.

Dear Dad,  

Don’t dig up that garden.   That’s where I buried
the bodies.  

Love, Vinnie

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police
arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies.
They apologized to the old man and left.   That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Dad,  

Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now.   That’s the
best I could do under the circumstances.  

Love you, Vinnie

   

People just send me this stuff.   No kidding.   :)…Jeanie

pictured: Some shots I snapped this morning of my future.   And it is good!

The Tomato

4 Home & Garden/Food & Seasons, Stuff I Actually Think, , ,

How can I communicate the taste, the essence of the tomato?

 

The tomato, ripened as God intended on the vine, is more complex and flavorful than almost any other.   With the slightest sprinking of salt on a freshly thick-cut slice, the exploding, tingling zest of life is captured on your tongue, the tangy bite melting into a powerful, full taste of the summer season.    The suggestion of  blazing  days of sun and long, warm nights are all contained in the deep red, seeded fruit.    Tart and sweet at the same time, the tomato is the iconic garden fruit, which when ripened, is  the vegetable to which all others must defer.  

Pick maybe just before you actually think it is ripe, maybe the day before you’ll eat it.   Never, ever refrigerate.   Always slice at room temperature for peak intensity, flavor.

Then try to figure out: what on earth does a tomato taste like?   For I – am at a loss for words.

I love the home-grown, organic tomato and believe it should be wholeheartedly celebrated…Jeanie

NOTE:   Oh yes, I have written about the tomato before, here and here and here.

pictured: google image, but one of the best ways to enjoy garden fresh tomatoes.   Slice, top with fresh chunks of mazarella and chopped basil, drizzle with extra-virgin olive oil and sweet balsamic vinegar.

“Do churches do to people what zoos do to animals?”

1 Christ is All, 9 TV & Movies/Books & Entertainment, Stuff I Actually Think, , , ,

That post title, my friends, was just one of the amazing “thought-questions”posed  in Mark Batterson’s upcoming tome.

I put aside both of the books I had been reading and skipped over the one I was suppose to start next to read a pre-released copy of Batterson’s Wild Goose Chase: Reclaim the Adventure of Pursuing God.    Once I picked it up for a quick perusal, I was hooked.

He explains the title:

Celtic Christians had a name for the Holy Spirit–An Geadh-Glas, or ‘the Wild Goose.’ The name hints at mystery. Much like a wild goose, the Spirit of God cannot be tracked or tamed. An element of danger, an air of unpredictability surround Him. And while the name may sound a little sacrilegious, I cannot think of a better description of what it’s like to follow the Spirit through life. I think the Celtic Christians were on to something…

The  author contrasts animals he got to observe living wild and free while in the Galapagos Islands (which he described as “Edenic” and a place that caused him to  feel a great affinity to Adam)  in contrast to those he was observing in a zoo a couple of months later.   No matter how you slice it, those zoo  animals are caged.   The whole book plays off the premise that we live our lives in 6  “cages”:  responsibility (where God-passions get buried beneath day-to-day living), routine (following our plans, never seeing another way), assumptions (those truths you begin to believe such as I could never…, I can’t…, I’m not…when you are living from your left-brain memory rather than your right-brain imagination).   Then there are the cages of guilt (defeat over all our  past sin and missteps), failure (doesn’t this one stink?? – trying and failing stops us from ever trying again), and finally the cage of fear (living life on the defense rather than the offense)  and goes on to explore both Biblical and modern-day  people who  were able to break  free of those confines.

Each chapter is complete and very-good-sermon-like, but  Mark Batterson  ties them all very well together as he leads us on the chase for the Wild Goose, living a life of adventure by the leading of the Holy Spirit.  

It’s an easy and quick read, with great humor, some interesting character study  and poignant story-telling.   It’s kind of like Eldridge’s  Journey of Desire  or The Sacred Romance, but waaaaaaay shorter and more quickly to the point.   He writes in a relaxing, conversational way that was not only engaging for the reading, but seemed to invite me into prayer as I read.   That is probably what surprised me the most: how much I was drawn into an awareness of the Presence and His leading as I was reading.    Batterson really had a way of posing thoughtful questions that immediately caused me to want to hear from God on the issue or confess and repent or ask for an answer or pray a commitment or something.   I prayed my way through most of the book.     Laughed and cried, too.

In that regard, I wholly recommend this book.   It isn’t about earth-shattering new revelation necessarily, but it is a call to that which the Spirit of God speaks to us constantly and we often ignore –  due to life’s “cages.”   That is why it rings so true, I guess, and why my heart took a fancy to the book, the idea and the call to chase the Wild Goose.   http://chasethegoose.com

Read it!…Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF:   I am part of something bigger and more important than me: the cause of Christ for this generation.  

SOME THINGS I UNDERLINED FROM THE FIRST HALF OF THE  BOOK:

We try to make God fit within the confines of our cerebral cortex.   We try to reduce the will of God to the logical limits of our left brain.   But the will of God is neither logical   nor linear.   It is downright confusing and complicated.   p.2

A part of us feels as if something is spiritually wrong with us when we experience circumstantial uncertainty…But [it] goes by another name: adventure.   p. 2

…inverted Christianity.   Instead of following the Spirit, we invite the Spirit to follow us. p. 4

…as I looked through the protective Plexiglas window at a four-hundred-pound caged gorilla: I wonder if churches do to people what zoos do to animals. p. 5

Just like the rich young ruler, we have a choice to make…We can stay in our cage, end up with everything and realize it amounts to nothing.   Or we can come out of our cage and chase the Wild Goose.   p. 10

Chapter Two: Goose Bumps p. 15

A few years ago I figured out how I want to die.   p. 15

But I do want to die doing what I love.   I am determined to pursue God-ordained passions until the day I die.   p. 16

Start praying.   Prayer makes us spiritually fertile.   And the more we pray, the more passionate we become.   Our convictions grow stronger and our dreams grow bigger.   p. 26

When Christianity turns into a noun, it becomes a turnoff.   Christianity was always intended to be a verb.   p. 29

I don’t want to do things I am capable of doing.   Why?   Because then I can take credit for them.   I want to see God do things in me and through me that I am absolutely incapable of so I can’t possibly take credit for them.   p. 35

Concerning Nehemiah:   If you are faithful in Babylon, God will bless you in Jerusalem.   p. 40

Have you ever experienced an epiphany – a moment when God unexpectedly and unforgettably invaded the monotony of your life…The Celtic Christians referred to these kinds of moments – moments when heaven and earth seem to touch – as thin places.   Natural and supernatural worlds collide.   Creation meets creator.   Sin meets grace.   Routine meets the Wild Goose.   p. 46

One name for God in Rabbinical literature is The Place.   p. 47

Altars help us remember what God doesn’t want us to forget.   They give us a sacred place to go back to.   p. 48

change of place + change of pace = change of perspective   p. 50

I know from experience that you can do the work of God at a pace that destroys the work of God in you.   p. 53

Sabbath… creates a holy margin in our lives…The word Sabbath means “to catch one’s breath.”   p. 54

Hurry kills everything from compassion to creativity.   p. 57

We need to quit praying out of memory and start praying out of imagination.   p. 60

Has God ever called you to throw something down?   Something in which you find your security or put your identity?   It’s awfully hard to let go, isn’t it?   It feels like you are jeopardizing your future.   And it feels like you could lose what is most important to you.   But that is when you discover who you really are.   p. 65

You have to be willing to let go of an old identity in order to take on a new identity.   p. 66

Pride is offended when assumptions are challenged.   Humility welcomes the challenge because the desire to know God is greater than the need to be right.   p. 75

It’s never too late to become who you might have been.   p. 79

Grace Notes

2 Mi Familia, 6 Looking Back // Memories!, Stuff I Actually Think, ,

Life’s Grace Notes: Unexpected moments of perfection, the  tiniest shimmer  of  beauty  piercing your heart.   The I-was-made-for-this minute; the unscheduled, fleeting, almost-unnoticeable events that make the life you have more valuable than you can imagine or could ever have hoped or asked for.

Grace note:   Daughter, Tara, sitting in the chair in the family room, singing the new song she has just written to the Lord.   The song is breathtakingly beautiful, outshone only by the  clarity of her voice,  striking and true.  

Grace note:   Rocky & Jovan drawing us all into a game of murder and angelic rescue and accusations called “Mafia.”   We laugh and turn on each other like there is no tomorrow, in the spirit of friendly, family  competition.   Laughing our heads off, we wonder why we don’t play games more?

 

Grace note: Stormie and Tredessa coming home from Venezuela after almost two weeks.   When Steph and the kids show up to see them, an impromtu weekday afternoon pool party ensues on a sunny, summer day.  

Grace note: Tredessa deciding to hang out here at our house for a few days following the trip.   Regular life gets placed aside because of our special “house guest,” and that is sweet.

Grace note:   Stormie, frustrated that the new card trick she keeps trying on everyone isn’t really that good.   The odds, which are supposed to be in her favor, keep landing in ours.   Fun for us.

 

Grace Note:   Gavin’s hair carefully self-styled – with gel, no less, for his Back-to-School night, which is really his first-ever night at school.

Grace note:   A God-appointed few hours with Stephanie, just the two of us and me so enjoying our conversation, I don’t notice that just one side of my face is getting burnt to a crisp, just one side.

Grace note:   Dave studying for a class he’ll be teaching…in the pool.   He is getting paid for it.   *smile…

Grace note:   Hunter pondering the Home of Refuge Orphange in Venezuela.   When I tell him, “They don’t have a mommy and daddy like you do.”   He tells me wisely, “God is their daddy now.”

Nothing earth-shattering.   Nothing you’d necessarily plan for or schedule in, but sweet and harmonious, the very sound of heaven, “the music of living.”   Extra notes and embellishments make the song all the sweeter.   I hum along.

It is unmerited, I assure you.   Are you hearing yours?…Jeanie

NOTE FO SELF:   Listen for the moments.

pictured: Stormie and Tredessa with the orphans; Gavin smelling a dinnerplate Dahlia; Hunter in his jammies, making me laugh  as the sun was setting one evening;   Dave on the clock.

Asparagus Beans

4 Home & Garden/Food & Seasons, Stuff I Actually Think,

I came across a package of Asparagus Bean seeds I’d forgotten about and had no room for.   I popped a few seeds into a potted jasmine container and forgot about them.   On a drive-by watering a week or so ago, I thought  I saw some green yarn tangled in the plant, but found instead that these bright green, very long, skinny beans were growing through the jasmine.  

 

In rereading the package, I learned that they will grow to 3 feet long if you want to harvest the bean from the pod, but to eat like a regular snap bean, you harvest them at 12-15 inches long, braid them and steam them for an unusual presentation.   Once they pop out, they seems to grow about 4″ a day.

They are funny looking, but fun.   The flavor, so says the package, is like a mix between asparagus, mushrooms and beans.   I stir-fried some and it was good, but I didn’t really detect 3 flavors.   I am still amused that it is like eating a shoestring-licorice style vegetable.

Hollyhock Dolls

4 Home & Garden/Food & Seasons, 6 Looking Back // Memories!, Stuff I Actually Think, , ,

 

When I grew up in Des Moines, Iowa, hollyhocks grew like weeds in the alleys and my friends and I used toothpicks and  hollyhocks  to create dolls now and again.   One toothpick was inserted into an unblossomed bud and then connected to an upside down bloom.   The second toothpick was poked through “the body” horizontally for “arms”.   Sometimes we held the toothpick between our finger and thumb under the “gown” and made our little dolls dance and twirl.

Guini and I made one a couple of days ago in between splashing pool times.   She is my “flower girl,” loving all the flowers and their names.

I love the flower girl…J

NOTE TO SELF:   Disperse the numerous hollyhock seedlings round the yard for more fun next year.

The Case of the Misdirected Sunflower

4 Home & Garden/Food & Seasons, 6 Looking Back // Memories!, Stuff I Actually Think, , , , ,

Facing est  

Dave and I met and married in North Dakota, where we both attended Bible College.   ’81 was our summer of love.   Our first date was 5.26.81 and we married on 7.23.81.  

The summers in North Dakota are spectacular.   It is a shame you can’t bottle that.   The sun takes almost forever to finally fall from the sky at night and is brilliant throughout the day.   North Dakota is a little, plain, shall we say, in some ways?   And flat.   Conservative.   And there are lots of white houses.

But one thing you see there that is better than anywhere else?   Fields of sunflowers, faithfully and brilliantly holding their gorgeous yellow-orange heads high and seemingly following the sun. True.   In the morning, their little faces facing east, then, operating in heliotropism, they would “follow the sun” until they were facing west by evening.   Sometime during the night, in anticipation of the next sunrise, they’d be facing east again.   A wonder to behold!

I threw a few sunflower seeds in the yard this year and have watched over the past few weeks as the unblossomed buds have heliotroped about, back and forth, east to west, daily.   But when the first 7-foot-high bloomer occured: nothing.   Nada.   It has faced the east and moved not one iota.   “What is wrong, tall flower?” I’d ask.   “Look this way, come on, look over here.”   No response.   It has fixed it’s gaze on my neightbor’s back porch and she rarely comes out.   True, her overly-zealous, fence-jumping  sprinklers do provide the needed waterings, which is why I decided to plant them in the awkward behind-the-pool space anyway.   Still, I am being ignored in favor of a woman who does not care.

Dave asked me if I planted the seeds backwards.   Har-dee-har-har.

In desperation, I Wikipedied this problem and am dismayed to  learn that sunflowers in the blooming stage (maturity, it seems)  are no longer heliotropic, but frozen in one direction, usually east, meaning all of my sunflowers will benefit some one else, as I will only get to gaze on their hinder parts.   This is indeed disturbing and so unlike, I am quite certain, their North Dakato fields of cousins.

But the case is solved.

I love the backyard, though…Jeanie

NOTE TO SELF:   Next year-Cannas!